Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Hipster Laptop

Are MacBooks too mainstream? Do you find the analog confines of your overpriced moleskin too restrictive? Do you need a piece of hardware that will set you apart from the sheeple of your local coffee shack as a creative, interesting person? Does that hardware also need to let you ironically re-tweet the asinine musing of all of those celebrities you follow on twitter?

Are graphics and color displays just too mainstream? Like, they're everywhere now. Just boxing us into this cultural preconception that computers need to be able to display video. I'm searching for a more pure experience, that isn't diluted by corporate eye candy.

Vintage Advanced Technologies LLC is working on revolutionary new laptop that promises to roll back the advancements of the last 20 years of computer technology. The HALster will feature a ridiculously low amount of RAM, a pathetically slow processor, and best of all a monochrome display that is only capable of displaying static text and images. The HALster features enough vintage technology that it will look great on your mantle in-between your record player and your film camera.

But don't worry; modern advances deemed useful and "Irony Neutral" are included so that the HALster retains a minimal amount of functionality. The battery will last through your most intense memoir writing session, and the wifi card will let you browse the internet in its purest form: straight HTML. Also, all images you view have the HALster's exclusive filter applied: Monocrhome and Low Res.

Follow the progress of our prototype here:

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