Our firm, CanusAdHumanium, seeks to increase client retention for our customers by limiting interactions with IT personnel. Our research, validated by years of industry experience, indicates that the leading cause of client defection is awkward and inappropriate interactions with critical yet socially inept personnel.
We seek to reduce these interactions through our new product, currently in the prototyping phase: GoobertronRepel2012. The device works by administering a "safe" level of voltage to the neck of the IT professional through tight fitting specialized neck ties. The shock is administered whenever the device comes too close to a current or potential client.
And what is a "safe" level of voltage? We are not sure, which is why we are looking for beta testers. We are looking for companies willing to run in-house trials of our system. Participating IT departments should consist only of adult males. Those with heart conditions should not participate.
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