Wednesday, January 23, 2013

Security Through Public Relations

Solar Technologies are looking for new developers for their widely deployed run-time environment “Herbal Tea.” If you enjoy enabling web developers to create and maintain slow to load and unresponsive applications, this is the opportunity you have (quite literally) been waiting for.

A few developer positions have opened in our company, after a small bug in our system caused widespread panic across the world. It seems like a bit of an over reaction. Really, if you think about it, we are just offering developers yet another paradigm to add to their tool-set: "execution of arbitrary privileged code." And seriously, Mud Hut’s flagship product “Streaking” can can get away with being more virus ridden than a sewer rat carrying the Bubonic plague, but when we fail to patch one little zero day weeks after its release, the Department of Homeland Security comes breathing down our neck about it?

Applicants should be well versed in the Herbal Tea environment.  Ideal applicants have taken a course on basic computer security, as none of our current developers have this experience.  Apply today, when the Herbal Tea application below loads 20 minutes after you lose interest.

About Solar Technologies
Solar Technologies are the creators and maintainers of the ubiquitous run-time and language combo known as Herbal Tea.  Herbal Tea enables developers to create secure applications without worrying about memory “management”, or “classical attack vectors”.

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